I So Didn't win....

This is not the post I'd hoped to be writing today. That one would've said something like "whoo-hoo! I'm in!" I was hoping to tell you how I was one of the five semi-finalists chosen by Cloth Paper Scissors in their Artisan Search. But I can't tell you that, the winners were announced today and I was not one of the semi-finalists chosen. So I debated writing a post at all. It'd be so easy to pretend nothing happened and hope you all forget how excited I was to enter and how much I wanted to win.

But tonight (I'm writing this on Monday night) I was thinking about this and it seemed a bit like I'd be hiding something from you and I'm really committed to being authentic about my journey with you. The whole journey. So here it is- I spent a lot of today feeling pretty disappointed. I'd wanted to be selected. I wanted to win. I didn't. I even re-read the list of semi finalists over a few times just to be sure I hadn't overlooked my name. But nope- not there. :)

I think it's easy when you're looking on to think that the people who are successful in our field are more talented then we are, to think that they have something we don't, that they're charmed and we're not. I know I've thought this in the past and if I had been chosen then I wouldn't have this opportunity to speak authentically and tell you  that it's not true. Although I may seem like I have it all together (or maybe I don't LOL) because I have a book coming out, or have my own style, or whatever else looks good to you and you feel you don't have, I don't possess anything special. I'm not more talented than you. I'm not leading a charmed life, or are luckier than anyone else. 

But I dare to try. To be brave, to risk failure, to put myself in a place where my self esteem could be shaken. A few years ago I wouldn't have tried at all. I'd have thought about it and then felt like it would have been too great a risk. What if I tried and failed? What if I put my very best out there to be judged and it wasn't good enough? It's easy to extrapolate that I'm no good, that I wasn't talented enough, that my work isn't good enough, but it's not true. That's not what "not being selected" means. It means that there were dozens of amazing artists all competing for the same title and the tough reality is that only five were chosen in each category. So I pick myself up, admit I'm disappointed and move on. I think I read somewhere that the people we think of as successful in their field have also usually failed more than anyone else in their field. They risk more, they lose more, they win more. It's important to go on.


So tonight I've decided to make the best of this situation and use it as an excuse to encourage you. I want you to know that if you decide to put yourself "out there" then there will be times that you won't get that article accepted, or that first book proposal might not pass, or no one will buy what you think is your very best work. None of these situations mean you're a bad artist, or not talented enough, or are dumb for even thinking you might be good enough. No one else thinks that of you either. Me- I'd probably just admire you for trying.

I know it's asking a lot but I'd like to know what you really think about this subject. So please please please leave a comment. :)

All Three of My Artisan Entries- Revealed!

I just finished entering my work into the Artisan contest. Wow! It's such an amazing feeling. Each artist was asked to submit three pieces of art and then two additional detail shots of each entry. I tried to enter three very different pieces to show as wide a variety of techniques, materials, and skills as possible. There is a connection between the three, which I talk about a bit at the end of this post (besides that they all contain wire and fabric in some way). You were also allowed a little description area to tell of your process, your inspiration, your materials and techniques. It's fairly daunting but also very very fun. I showed you the completed angel last post and I did show you close ups of the first two but not the completed pieces. SO today I thought I'd do a big reveal of all three images (drum roll please....) :)

Entry #1: My Life Story is Unfolding- Stitched Wire Sculpture

The idea behind this piece was to take my journal entries from 2d to 3d. I also love the idea of a person's life unfolding as a flower does. Bits and pieces are revealed as if petal by petal. I realized not long ago, while journaling that my life has been unfolding and has now reached the point where most of the major questions I had as a child have been answered. There's more to the story behind this piece so if you'd like to read more go here.

Entry #2: Creative Bloom Mixed Media Quilt

This is the quilt I showed you a sneak peak of over a week ago in this post. It was a work in progress photo so I thought I'd show you how it came out. Again, there's a story behind this piece that I'd love to have you read about here.

Entry #3: My Angel of Inspiration- Stitched Sculpture

I really do love how this one came together. A total gift from God. I've never done arms on any of my angels before, I'd never added clothes, and I'd never added the little elements like the flowers, needles, or polymer clay bird before. The fact that her coat actually fit her is a miracle unto itself- seriously. I really do love how she turned out though. She feels like such an expression of who I am as an artist.

The connection between all three of these pieces is that they were all inspired by inspiration. It's an idea I love thinking about. Where does inspiration come from? How does it work? Why do you get ideas out of the blue? Can you cultivate it? How do you get more? I explored all of these questions when I wrote my upcoming book, Creative Bloom. I'm really excited to be able to share more about the book and as we near the two months to publication date next week I expect to be able to give you a couple of glimpses. But, in the meantime I'd love to know what inspires YOU most? and how is this reflected in your art? Is it? Please leave a comment and share with us!!

My Girl

I finished her the other night and hate to leave her anywhere. I move her from room to room with me throughout the day and love looking at her. She's my Angel of Inspiration and she represents who I am as an artist. She's constructed primarily of fabric and wire- my personal fave's. She is also very mixed media and glories in it. Besides fabric and wire she has a torso made of a spool of thread and arms that are paper clay. Her skirt and jacket are- of course- artist's canvas and have needles embedded on either side of the front. You've probably caught the sewing theme by now but for extra emphasis she's holding a small embroidery scissor given to my by my mother. Besides sewing she loves found objects (the pieces of carpenter's ruler) and she is of course, much enamored with birds. Because she represents my inspirations I had to include my love of drawing and color by adding in the used and broken bits of caran' dache crayons.

Because I love flowers (you all know that I do) she wears flowers, one in her hair at one at her breast. She's my girl and I love her and I hope you do too. She is also, my final entry for the Artisan contest so I am done done done! In the few weeks since I decided to jump in and enter so many amazing artists have contributed their work to the contest, I really want to encourage you all to stop over and take a look. But it's a little scary. There are some truly amazing works and I look at my entries and feel the pull to protect them and myself by not entering. If I don't then there's nothing risked and I won't feel badly if no one likes them. But if I do enter, and post my three little projects then I'll feel like I've been brave and feel good about myself for having done it. The flip side of course, is feeling regret if I let this opportunity, this chance, pass.

So I'm gonna jump- I think My Angel would approve.